Daniel Tiger. Is there a better show on TV right now that helps preschoolers get through some tough emotions? I find myself humming “Grown-Ups Come Back” every time my husband hurries out the door, leaving me with 4 little hungry monsters begging for food. It’s great! Those melodically inconsistent songs can get you through so many feels. However, between 4 children I have found that Daniel Tiger, who I will affectionately refer to as DT like I do in real life, doesn’t exactly cover ALL the bases. Here are some song ideas for the upcoming seasons of DT’s Neighborhood, from a woman who survived 3 preschoolers and has one to go.
1. If the Sun Is Down, Lay Down – Please DT writers, can we get a little something to help us out with Daylight Savings Time? We are DYING here. I’d love it if my preschooler didn’t spend a week waking up at 5am this year.
2. I Know the Dentist Looks Scary (She Scares Me Too), But She Won’t Kill You- I vaguely remember an episode where DT was nervous about the dentist, but were the really scary tools ever addressed? Or the mask wearing? The dentist looks like a straight-up bandit coming at you with a noisy tool and it’s really scary. I -uh-mean, for a 3 year old.
3. English Muffins Aren’t Actually Muffins – One of life’s hard lessons. English Muffins are not sweet or muffin shaped or delicious (according to my kids). My son actually took apart his English Muffin, frantically trying to find a muffin hidden inside. If I were a good mom I would have maybe made him some muffins because he was pretty upset. But, if this song existed, he would have been ready for one of life’s biggest disappointments.
4. We Don’t Need to Find Out If It Floats (Let’s Leave Floating to Boats)– Yeah, Mommy’s phone sinks and so do your brother’s remote control cars.
5. Yes, We Eat Animals Sometimes (Like The Ones in Your Farm Book) – Sorry vegan friends, but every meat eater eventually has to have this conversation with their child. The moment they connect chicken the food with chicken the animal. The moment we fear our kid might become a vegetarian.
6. Snacks Are Not Dinner, Stop Asking For Crackers – The answer will never be yes, kid. Sing this song for solace.
7. Don’t Tell Mommy She’s Fat (Even If It’s True) – Yep, this happened and I cried a little. He had no idea why I was crying though, because he of course was not trying to hurt my feelings. This song would have helped us through this awkward lesson.
8. I Know You Love Your Brother and That’s Really Sweet, But Please Don’t Touch His Eyeballs. – Pretty self explanatory.
9. Why Do You Take 400 Pictures Of the Same Exact Thing? – I know that TV wires hanging around all messy are intriguing, but can I not have a million pictures documenting the disarray that is our living quarters? Why do you do this?
10. Where Did You Find That Sharpie?/Writing Is For Paper – Not for walls, or tables, or chairs, or brothers, or yourself. Not even if you are turning yourselves into tigers or dalmatians. No paper, no writing. And where did you even find that Sharpie? I have never bought Sharpies in my life.
Feel free to sing any of these to your children, in any melody you wish. What songs would you add